Category: Uncategorized

Back from Austin. I am so damned happy at the moment. Borderline deliriously happy. Joy joy joy! Oh, what a beautiful evening! O happy day!

To all Cajuns and/or wannabe Cajuns in the DFW area: Need some crawfish? Some live, creepy-crawly, delicious melt-in-your-mouth crawfish? Fruge Aquafarms, just outside Rayne, has a warehouse in Grand Prairie where they keep live crawfish just shipped from Louisiana on their way to shipment across the country, and you can evidently go pick up your crawfish there cheap — maybe a buck or two a pound.
That’s a hell of a lot cheaper than what you pay if you buy your crawfish pre-peeled or get it shipped direct from the bayou. (I know all this scoop because my cousin Pam works at Fruge’s and I had some of my uncle’s 70 pounds in Rayne on Easter Sunday.)
Now I just need a big pot, a lot of butane, some old newspapers, and some Zatarain’s to make a weekend complete.

Forgot to link to my story in today’s paper, on fingerprinting teachers to check their criminal backgrounds.

Correction of the day.

Ooooh, literary catfight! As imperfect a vessel as Gore Vidal is for the message, it’s about time somebody called out Dominick Dunne, perhaps the most fawning, obsequious social climber in “journalism” today.

As much as I hate to rag on my former coworkers, how stupid do you have to be as a reporter to believe that a broadcast radio station is going to start charging listeners to hear the morning drive-time show? When it’s supposed to debut on April 1? (The original version of this story had a note from the reporter at the top saying something to the effect of, “Since it’s April 1, I feel it’s necessary to tell you that this is a real story, not an April Fool’s joke.” Here’s the radio station’s gleeful mea culpa.

Barry Bonds hits two homers on opening day. So, officially, he’s on pace to hit 324 home runs this season. I think that would be a record.
I’ll be in Austin tomorrow for morning meetings, but if anybody wants to do anything in the afternoon, drop me a line.

I’ll be on TXCN again tonight, but I’d advise you to stay away from what turned out to be my poorest performance to date. I do best with topics I can half-joke about, and it’s hard to start popping out the funnies when your topic is child-molesting teachers.
Of course, a measily TXCN appearance is nothing compared to my friend Juliet, who found out today she’ll be included in next year’s Best American Sports Writing. Brava!

Congrats to Byron Mouton and the Maryland Terrapins for bringing home the title. Byron had only four points and four rebounds, but anyone who saw the game could tell he was the firebrand leading the troops into battle, getting everyone charged up, playing strong defense and making the clutch hustle play when the team needed someone to.
Quoth the CBS announcers last night: “Mouton is making all the plays that don’t show up on the stat sheet.” Quoth Dick Vitale: “Byron Mouton was an unsung hero for the Terps, contributing all of the intangibles needed to win a title.”
He’s a bit of a stretch for the NBA right now, but he’s got good size and the quickness to be a two-guard at the next level — I wouldn’t be surprised if we saw him there in a few years after some time in Europe. And the stadium announcer should be shot for pronouncing our hometown as “RAY-knee” — it’s pronounced “rain,” people.

More evidence that M&M is hiding something. (For background, see here, here, here, and here.)
Kelly, who was long ago outed as a skeptic when it comes to my tireless M&M research, decided to take matters into her own hands by sending an email to the M&M junta itself:
TO:
The M&Ms(R) Team
M&Ms
800 High Street
Hackettstown, NJ 07840
FROM:
Kelly Lecker
RE: Your M&Ms Reference # is 1309379
I have a question for M&Ms